Tweets

confirmance:

do you ever like randomly wake up in the middle of the night check your social networks then go back to sleep 

(via sexpectinq)

cumillionaire:

If my jokes offend you:

  1. I’m sorry
  2. It won’t happen again
  3. 1 & 2 are lies 
  4. You’re a pussy

(Source: 69shadesofgray, via ichbincornhole)

You have a butt and I have a pair of hands gosh what a coincidence

(Source: nerdsfuckhard, via shiitmyballs)

dashdrive:

everyone has seen dicks they didn’t want to see

(via humorking)

emotionated:

IT MAKES ME SO FRUSTRATED HOW I CANT CONTROL MY OWN FUCKING FEELINGS, THEYRE MINE WHY CANT I CONTROL THEM?!?!

(via do-raymi)

officialbrucespringsteen:

hey isnt that jonas brother a disney kid

and now he’s half naked everywhere

and everyone is admiring him for growing up so nicely

wasnt miley cyrus a disney kid too

and she was half naked everywhere

and everyone freaked their fuckin shit

(via stability)